Something to ponder upon...

In my last post, at the end, I mentioned that there was another thing that happened during the year. Several in fact.

First, Pak Long passed away during the second week of Ramadhan. It was shock to all the family, but Paksu did mention to Mak that he may not make it to this raya. So raya was a bit mellow, but with the children around, it was cheerful enough.

On the lighter scale, Abg Salahuddin got married and Mu'az had a daughter. So did Abg Munir and Abg Ji had a son. Kak Ijah got married again, so now Adam has a new 'abah'. They look so cute together, and I am truly happy for them.

The final thing that happened, and this set me back a few notch, was when Bapak was admitted to the hospital. I had noticed that he had lost a lot of weight, but I only put it on the fact that he was exercising and left it at that. I found out when Mak called, the day that we were being briefed on the OIC members visiting IIUM, and the Communication dept was given the task to interview the delegates. I was chosen, along with Miera and the Practicum class to interview the guests. Of course I dropped out, and rushed to the hospital. Waji drove me, and Miera came along. It was devastating and I couldn't hold back my tears.

You know, we all have heard and seen death. We have seen people we know pass away. But the moment we had to endure it for ourselves, we realise how hard it is to face seeing the future without their presence in our lives. And as for Bapak, he is the father, the leader of the family, the ground for which we, as the family, hold on to and feel where we belong. To loose him .... To even think of loosing him... I know I have to accept it as the fact of life, but for now, I want to deny it at all cost. To say to myself that he will get better. That he will live on. But the fact remains, that he was diagnosed with liver failure, and anything to do with liver failure, it's all downhill from there. Pak Long was diagnose with the same failure.

But I guess for now, I thank Allah for giving us a heads up. For giving us time so that we can spend the remaining days together. For giving us the opportunity to rectify our ways. For showing us that there is more to US than meets the eye. So I take all the time blessed to us, and use it as wisely as possible, so that when the time comes, there will be no regrets. Please Allah, helps Us and guide Us in Our journey towards finding Your Blessing... Amin...